In March, I was recounting some of my difficulties of working in Cyprus to a Danish colleague who said: “Never give up, never!” At the time, I concurred but I’ve given it quite some further thought, and believe that there are times and extenuating circumstances when one simply does have to STOP!
The fine line and question is “When?” Does an entrepreneur give up because his first meeting didn’t go well – of course not, you tighten the bit and get on with it. Not once, twice or even three times – countless times as the difficulties will often seem insurmountable. However, when you’ve given it at least 6 months and look back, you will see either some progress or lots of lessons learned. That is progress in itself – it’s part of the university of life.
Does an author give up after the first rejection from a publisher? I can almost hear countless authors unanimously shouting a raucous no. But, it might be a good idea to have a few more people read the book and have their opinions. Something very simple in the story line which seems illogical might need a little improvement.
There are business situations though where stopping might be the only option. When one is sinking financially, over a long period of time and the stress is making one physically and emotionally ill, there needs to be a cut-off point. It may only require some outside help to turn the situation around, but continuing in a similar way, is sheer lunacy. I would also advocate an outside consultant – someone with no ulterior motives who will proffer a brutally honest reply. Remember – if you are spending your time on something that is not working, you are not spending the time on something that might!
Does a mother give up on her child? Well, this is a no for most situations, but I’ve been considering what would I do if I had a child who was a drug addict. A child who stole from me, who beat me, who implicated me in drug trafficking of which I had no knowledge? Where does one say “No More! This has to stop. I need to do ‘tough love’ in order to keep my sanity.”
Relationships and marriages come and go…and most often, it’s ones pride which is most damaged. I truly believe if we put ourselves in the shoes of the partner for a short while, we would have greater empathy, tolerance and understanding. But there are times when one must simply say, “Ciao” and move onwards.
Many people, including me, have given up a fairly well-paid job, to venture into entrepreneur land. It’s tough out there – make no mistake and one is in for a long roller-coaster ride, but those highs are so high, that one strives to get to the next mountain. I’ve thought often of giving up –personally and professionally but always say to myself – if I feel like this tomorrow and the day after, I will consider another route. It’s a matter of evaluating according to your beliefs.
These are 3 signs which might help one decide on changing paths…
The issue has taken over your life with the excitement about achieving it completely gone!
Lack of confidence and physical illness – when self-doubt permeates the day and you feel as if you cannot achieve anything.
Nobody is interested in solving the problem – particularly pertinent in relationships, where the outcome also depends on the other person.
A “give up decision” is like ripping a plaster off a wound. It’s painful but if you don’t change the plaster, the wound will take a long time to heal. The long and short of it is – it’s quite alright to say NO and STOP!